They're Playing Our Song!!!

Due to the inclement weather this week... I've been stuck in the house wasting my brain away with television, twitter, and redbox dvds *straight face*.  Seriously, each night amidst nightly phone conversations, I religiously tune into the same re-ran and syndicated sitcoms = = = =>>>> A Different World, Living Single, and Martin on TvOne.  These shows are then followed by a quick station change to catch whatever sitcoms Nickelodeon's Nick @ Nite  airs for the remainder of the night.  This night, however, went a bit differently.  My usual line up of sitcoms served a purpose greater than simple television entertainment, they inspired a blog entry.  Tonight's episode of A Different World dealt with Ron discovering this crazy want that he had for Freddie, even though he was dating Kim.  Living Single of course is always centered around a dating story line, hence its title.  While Martin chronicled Martin and Gina's break-up, which ended in a duet of Rick James and Teena Marie's Fire and Desire.

Every show I tuned into tonight focused on a situation of love and/or secret crushes and desires.  And in each story line, us viewers were aware of the male character's true feelings for a particular female character; while she remained left in the dark.  So with twitter being the birthplace of profound/scholarly thoughts that warrant deep and controversial discussion (sarcasm alert!), I tweeted the following:

I know guys really b in their room/car 

singing love songs, thinking about a girl lol. 

When a female gets u to that point, u need to wife her

Please ignore the bad grammar and mechanics.  It was Twitter, and I had to make what I was thinking fit into 140 characters.  Anywho, I was hoping that a few of my male followers/friends would reply to this tweet, giving me some type of confirmation and insightfulness.  Instead, my female followers/friends gladly "retweeted" it.  No conversation, no discussion.  But the question relating to my aforementioned tweet still remains contested.  Females, of course we sing love songs to the top of our lungs.  We feel every lyric of a love song when a guy has our heart, and then that song becomes embedded in our brain and unofficially deemed "our" song.  We'll make a song "our" song not only because of it's relation lyrically, but because of a moment spent together while that song just so happened to be playing, even if it was just  while washing dishes.  We'll even give a guy we hate a song.  Why do you think females sing so hard to Beyonce's "Irreplaceable" or Lauryn Hill's "Ex-Factor"?  Those aren't really love songs.

I recall an episode of Fresh Prince when Will realized he was in love with Lisa, Nia Long's character.  He asked Uncle Phil, "how do you know when you're in love?"  And Uncle Phil replied, "you know you're in love, when those sappy love songs start making sense."  Now it's hard to justify that reasoning for females whole-heartedly because as I previously stated, we'll relate even a semi-love song to an underserving man.  We're always stuck in nostalgia.  For men though, is Uncle Phil right?  When you start loving, feeling, or even crushing hard on a woman... do love songs start meaning more to you?  Do men here Boyz II Men's I'll Make Love to You and start fantasizing about making love, not just having sex, but making love to a particular woman?  For my "thug life" gentlemen, instead of Boyz II Men, do you hear Method Man and Mary J. Blige's All I Need and think of how much she means to you?

If I'm wrong... and love songs aren't an indicator, then what is it that makes a man realize that he's got a good woman?  What makes a man see that his crush on her is deeper than any old crush, or that he's potentially in love?  And for any of this to occur, does this woman have to be your "woman", or can this woman be someone you're dating/talking to or someone you don't actually have because she is off limits?  As females, it is expected that we love hard.  When a guy grabs our heart, we don't mind telling the world.  For some of us, it may take some time to get to that point.  She may have to feel out the level of maturity between the two of them; decide whether or not he'll become an asshole when she lets her guard down or treat her like a queen.  But once she has her mind made up and has given him her heart, she'll give him her everything.

In my opinion, the male species isn't as cardio-deficient as he seems.  If anything, men love hard as well and hurt even harder.  When a man isn't comfortable with another man's actions around his woman, his jealousy and/or disapproval is felt without him being in the same room.  When a man crushes on a woman and decides that he wants her, he will do everything in his power to see her, to hang with her, to have her, to merely be in her presence.  When a man has made up his mind that a woman has his heart, he doesn't mind allowing her to be his soft spot.  And talk about hurting hard, you can always spot the guy whose had his heart broken early on in life.  He is the one that's usually quick to turn to womanizing, calling every woman a "broad" or "hoe", vowing to play her before she plays him.

Not trying to make myself out to be anyone's expert, I'm just curious as to what makes a woman the object of a man's love song?  What makes a man deem a song, "our song"?  I don't care how tough, macho, or manly a guy thinks he is... there's always at least one woman who can make him as soft as the next.  Fellas, the next time you're in your room or car and you catch yourself vibing to a love song with a certain woman consuming your thoughts; don't be ashamed.  You might be onto something. Take a moment to realize how much this woman might actually mean to you.  Just hope that she's singing the same kind of love song for you.  

“Music produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without.” ~Confucius