Eating, Praying, Loving

(Friday, January 7, 2011)

 

Last night, around 6 o'clock in the evening, I decided to grab a pack of Keebler's Fudge Striped cookies, a steak and cheese sandwich, a cup of Minute Maid Berry Punch, and watch a movie that I had been dying to see... "Eat, Pray, Love".  While everyone else was stuck in bumper to bumper rush hour traffic, standing on a crowded train, or lugging a day's worth of work into their respective places of residence... I was already winding down for the night.

In case you have been locked in a cave and have absolutely no idea what "Eat, Pray, Love" is about, let me fill you in briefly.  It stars the magnificent Julia Roberts (Pretty Woman), as she finds herself newly divorced and on a quest to regain herself through traveling, eating, meditating, praying, and eventually loving with the help of an old tooth-less medicine man from what I call Bally-wood.  Simply put, she's has a mid-life crisis.  Of course this movie sounds like your average chick flick, but it was extremely insightful.  It's based on the memoirs of Elizabeth Gilbert... meaning this was indeed an actual woman's journey.

I am not a huge fan of the average lovey-dovey chick flick.  Why?  Because, unless I am madly in love with someone, those movies tend to make me jealous and bring on unwanted nostalgia. "Eat, Pray, Love" was different.  For majority of the movie, Julia Roberts' character didn't have a love interest... her focus was more on finding herself.  When adults who are 40 and over began to search for themselves, we generally call that a mid-life crisis.  However, I believe that there is a thing such as "20's life crisis".  Post college you hit a point, as you get closer to 30, when you realize that life isn't making sense anymore.  Your dreams no longer seem attainable, and you're not even sure if you want to pursue that area further anyway.  Your friends begin to get married and start their families, graduate from law/medical/grad school, make big moves across country; and if you are not doing any of the above then you feel as if you're being left behind.  Eventually you find yourself on a quest to find... well, yourself.

You went through 4 years (or more) of undergrad believing that you had it all figured out.  Then life shows up somewhere between the graduation dinner and 2nd career change making you feel as if you have a long way to go.  I think everyday, "damn, so I'm going to be working for the rest of my life?"  That's when you realize that you are screwed if you don't find your passion soon.  And around the 5th or 6th date, and/or major argument with your gf/bf you realize that marriage is a long ways away if you don't find a boo soon.  Funny because the average person knew that life would be grand and perfect at 26.  Well who is to say that it isn't.  Just because you haven't reached your goals doesn't mean that you're not on the right track.  This is where eating, praying, and loving come into play.

I'm not perfect.  I myself am going through my "20s life crisis" which is why I can define it so exact.  I feel as if I'm so close to having almost everything I want but as if it's being dangled in front of my face like a T-bone steak covered in Kibbled and Bits being dangled in front of a starving dog who just left Noah's Arc.  Every other week I'm motivated and passionate about my future.  Then as soon as life throws me a lemon I'm knocked off track and back questioning where I'm headed.

The "20s Life Crisis" exists now because our generation is so far ahead of its time.  Those of us in our 20s are the moving force that created social networks like Twitter, Facebook, and Myspace.  We are the ones who pushed the campaign that put our nation's first black president in office.  We are the ones who weren't drafted into war, but signed up voluntarily despite knowing that our country is currently at war.  Our generation is so used to urgency.  We need to take a minute, breathe, and think about this.  Life still moves at its own pace, no matter how fast we receive emails now.  It's okay if you haven't discovered yourself yet.  Julia Roberts' character had a mid-life moment to finally find balance.  If we take our time now, then we can avoid having a drastic change and mental breakdown post 40.

In the movie, Julia Roberts encounters several people on her journey who help her learn how to simply appreciate the person that she is and her blessings.  She meditates and prays every morning, and eats what her heart desires... because this is what makes her happy.  Not the material things, the jobs, the husband, the things that we feel we are supposed to have in life.  She learns how to make herself happy.  And got dammit if food makes you happy, eat it!  As long as you have your ambition and a dream... things will start to fall into place on their own.  As you can see Julia Roberts' character didn't sit around and cry the whole movie, stressing doesn't make anything come faster.  I whole-heartedly believe that God's assistance will come into play when it's your turn anyway.... that's the praying part ya know. Lastly, there's this thing called love... it happens... but will only thrive when you yourself are complete.

Lessons I learned from "Eat, Pray, Love":

1. When you find yourself obsessing over the past... wish him or her love in your mind... then drop it.

2. The space that you're using in your head worrying and obsessing needs to be removed so that that space can be filled with new and wonderful blessings.

3. Learn how to simply empty your thoughts... meditate.

4. Pray everyday.

5. To be balanced does involve loving and being loved, but after you have found balance within yourself.

6. Don't just exist... stop always waiting for things to happen.

7. Appreciate those and those things that make you happy.

8. Know when it's time... whether to change, to move on, to grow, to let go... Peace is the end result.

There were many other lessons in this movie, but I leave the rest for you to make your own interpretations.  I suggest watching this movie alone so that you can grasp the lessons and really identify with Julia Robert's character through your true emotions.  The title makes so much sense in explaining the essentials of life... essentials that I know will get me through my "20s Life Crisis"... eating, praying, and loving.  

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life."  ~Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love.